You’re A Baller?: What Are You Wearing?
What Are You Wearing?
This pickup PSA is related to on-court attire. On his classic hit “Summertime”, the Fresh Prince hustled to the mall, to get him a short set and a new pair, because basketball courts in the summer got girls there. While this may be true for him, you’ve gotta follow some simple rules for non-millionaire rappers and actors.
First, just because you wear Jordans or Foams to the court doesn’t mean you will be looked at as having any more credibility. It actually may have the reverse effect, because you may not get picked because you look like you’re there to hang out and not play. To quote Kwame, “Just because you buy the gear does not mean you are near.”
Secondly, in the same vein, don’t wear anything to the court that you wouldn’t want to get messed up. Things happen. Your Gucci shirt might get ripped by overzealous basketball guy/girl. No one has time for you to wipe off your kicks while a fast break is happening down the other end. Don’t get mad because someone stepped on your kicks, because God forbid someone stepped on your sneakers while 10 people are jumping and running in an area limited by space.
Most importantly, do not, do not, do not, ever, under any circumstances, wear jeans to the basketball court when you have the intentions of playing. Stopping by on the way home from school, etc, shooting around, that’s fine..in theory. But if you wake up and think “yeah, I’m going to the court to play”, and roll on out of your bed and put some jeans on, just stop. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. No one is picking you. No one has time for you to adjust your belt, or to hear your complaints about how the crossover’s not working because it’s hitting the jean fabric. Get some shorts.