This is Why New York City Parents are Little Babies
New York City parents and their over-the-top antics are beginning to hit a nerve.
Like most performers who’ve made their way in the big city, I’ve had many side jobs. While the majority of my peers seem to wait tables, I prefer dealing with whiny children as opposed to whiny adults. I babysit.
Babysitter Extraordinaire
I’m the eldest (isn’t ‘eldest’ much more prestigious than ‘oldest’?) of three and my mother worked providing child-care, so it comes naturally. I’m excellent at imagination games and improvising stories, an under-demanded skill beyond the playground. Being good at make-believe doesn’t exactly instill one with a sense of superiority, but as I met the city’s elite children, a miraculous thing happened.
Patience
Patience is the key to dealing with unruly children. If you wait out their emotional outburst, you always win. Unfortunately, in a fast-paced city like New York, many kids can whine their way into anything, especially with over-taxed parents who want all their kid time to be “fun time.”
I’d meet New York City parents complete with pristine designer clothes and expensive work gadgets. They “summer”, have country houses, own horses, sit on boards for prestigious institutions, video-conference, and have access to private aircrafts. My fancy clothes come from H&M, and my idea of luxury is an unlimited metrocard.
When presented with an irrational, screaming child, they were just as bewildered as anyone. Perhaps more so, as I suspect they were used to giving the tantrums at work. They weren’t skilled in exercising patience- they want it done ASAP or someone’s fired! I’ve seen enough movies to jump to some pretty thorough conclusions about “high powered executives.”
Assuming this, I’m especially smug when I’m able to soothe/distract their child with only a modified improv game. And they said majoring in Theatre wouldn’t get me anywhere!
Entitlement
Sometimes I get to see what entitlement is like all grown up. I was acquainted with the granddaughter of a pretty famous person. Her dad, son of famous person, was a talkative dude but it was painfully obvious he hadn’t gotten a lot of “you-kind-of-sound-like-a-dick” tone-check comments in his life. His intentions seemed good, only out-of-touch and ill-conveyed.
I always try to cut privileged people a break- To me, equality means treating everyone the same with dignity. I will admit I think bad rich people wreak more havoc on the world than bad poor people, but on principle I give big shots a chance to show me they can be awesome too. Other nannies were not so kind.
Bigshots
This dad, I’ll call him Mr. Bigshot, in particular felt he was very funny and I’m a comedian, so he was especially keen on joking around me. Apparently “all his friends” thought HE should give standup a try.
He’d often try to tease one of the kids I babysat, an awkward 7-year-old boy. He’d mock the kids interests as exceedingly dorky. When the boy would just blink in response, Mr. Bigshot got irritated. One time he loudly declared, “That kid’s got no personality. He’s not gonna get anywhere in life with that attitude.”
Then it was my turn to stare blankly. Did a grown man just get offended a second grader didn’t like his jokes? Oh, ego, you fragile thing.
Seeing powerful people become utterly undone by a bit of tantrum-throwing or awkwardness is something I can endure with relative ease, and instills a confidence within me in my professional pursuits. They wouldn’t be able to do it without people like me.
