Kanye as President, What Would It Look Like?

KANYE1

Using our patented KTB BreezeScope™ to look at potential futures, we located a news report from April 30, 2021, 100 days after Kanye West was sworn into office as The President of the United States of America. 

Many called him crazy when he announced his presidential aspirations 5 years ago at the MTV Video Music Awards. Many called him far worse for even considering himself worthy to be the “leader of the free world;” however, in 2015, when Kanye West made clear his 2020 presidential intentions, he seemingly set off a chain reaction that saw the universe conspiring to make his intentions reality. 

Ask 50 people and you’ll hear a hundred responses as to how exactly Kanye West became president. Did West successfully galvanize the youth vote? Were people just voting ironically? Was the country so fed up with the excess and criminal negligence of the Trump administration that the people were ready for anything they perceived as radically different? It will be some time before we know whether Kanye West is the best person for the job in 2020, but one thing remains irrefutable – Kanye West’s first 100 days in office have been as unpredictable as his presidential announcement in 2015. Here are the highlights.

kanye-west-president-1_240x340_1

The First 100 Days of President Kanye West

  • Becomes the first president to perform at his own inauguration, where he performs an hour and thirty minute set of his own music before unveiling an updated version of his 2016 smash, “Listen To The Kids, Bro! (Part 2)” featuring Jay-Z, Beyonce, Taylor Swift, and Kendrick Lamar. Promptly announces the “Hail to the Yeezus” World Tour as a surefire method of balancing the national debt.
  • Takes the Oath of Office without incident until the end where instead of repeating “So help me God,” President West instead responds with “So help me, Me.”
  • Names Caitlyn Jenner as White House Press Secretary. He cites her world class athlete work ethic, impeccable shoe game, and artful commitment to transparency exhibited during her transition in 2015 as the reasons offering her the position. Caitlyn promptly signed on for a new reality show titled, “Caitlyn: I Am Press Secretary” which is all about reaching out to the transgender press secretary community.
  • Appoints fellow rapper and long time collaborator Shawn “Jay-Z” Carter as Secretary of Treasury, saying the following about his long time collaborator: “To date, there is nobody better at getting money than Jigga.” Carter, after expressing cool certainty at his prestigious appointment joked of his expectation to go the way of original Secretary of Treasury Alexander Hamilton who famously resigned the position in 1795 because he wasn’t making enough money.
  • Creates the “No Child Left UnFly” School Uniform initiative in which several top designers would design different versions of government sponsored public schools uniforms so that “no child would be without dope threads during the school year.”
  • Declares he has “decided everyone was finished” with college,  pledging to dismantle state institutions of higher education in favor of federally funded schools that will teach “whatever it is people wanna do” for no charge.
  • Mr. West storms out of an interview with Bill O’Reilly, after O’Reilly claimed Mr. West was a “Pop Star President.” West proclaimed that “Fox News ain’t never had no answers” before vowing to use the power of the office to force them become a real and respected news institution. Comedian Chris Rock famously joked, that “Kanye would have an easier time committing suicide.” 
  • Signs an Executive Order revoking tax exempt status for all organizations (including churches and the NFL) unless they promote aggressive self-love. 
  • In a failed attempt to broker a lasting peace between Israel and Palestine, First Lady Kim Kardashian-West bares all in Jerusalem igniting a firestorm of controversy. The swell of traffic from the ensuing photos caused Time Magazine’s servers to shut down for the first time in over a decade.
  • Proposes “Strange Fruit” as sung by Beyonce Knowles as his top choice for a new national anthem for the United States of America.
  • Replaces presidential entrance music “Hail to the Chief” with the song “Champion,” from the 2007 Kanye West album, Graduation
  • Opens his 2021 State of the Union Address with “At least you know this time, the President cares about Black People.” For the first time in the history of television, several networks cut away from a presidential address and back to regularly scheduled programming. 
  • Spearheads a significant White House redesign through his multi platform creative agency, DONDA. The intent of this historic redesign, according to Press Secretary Caitlyn Jenner, is to “create a space more in line with offering total access and honesty to the American People.”  Secretary of Culture, Paul McCartney, of the newly created Department of G.O.O.D, chimed in, “Yes… the color of the White House will change.

Comments

comments

Michael Bridgett

Writer, vocalist, lyricist and raconteur. In other words, the guy everyone really loved at the party. I traffic in things geek, existential, fun and funny. I believe that it is the compassionate sharing of ideas that will lead us to a new age. An age in which all benefit no matter who we are, where we are, or what we want. We must allow ourselves to grow beyond tribal concerns as the fate of everything is at stake. What we do here gets us one bit closer every day.

You may also like...

16 Responses

  1. December 8, 2017

    ready yet

    […]Here is an excellent Blog You may Discover Interesting that we Encourage You[…]

  2. December 8, 2017

    panel

    […]Wonderful story, reckoned we could combine several unrelated data, nonetheless actually really worth taking a look, whoa did one find out about Mid East has got much more problerms also […]

  3. December 8, 2017

    خرید اپل ایدی

    Thanks yet again for the weblog post.Genuinely thank you! Wonderful.

  4. December 9, 2017

    overallforworkers

    […]we prefer to honor lots of other online sites on the internet, even though they aren?t linked to us, by linking to them. Underneath are some webpages worth checking out[…]

  5. December 9, 2017

    Pakiautorehvid

    […]we came across a cool internet site which you may well enjoy. Take a appear in the event you want[…]

  6. December 9, 2017

    shin chan movie robot dad in tamil

    […]here are some links to web-sites that we link to because we assume they’re worth visiting[…]

  7. December 9, 2017

    motivational speeches

    […]very couple of sites that transpire to be in depth below, from our point of view are undoubtedly effectively worth checking out[…]

  8. December 9, 2017

    guided relaxation audio

    […]always a huge fan of linking to bloggers that I really like but really don’t get quite a bit of link really like from[…]

  9. December 9, 2017

    silicone sex toy

    […]check beneath, are some completely unrelated sites to ours, nonetheless, they are most trustworthy sources that we use[…]

  10. December 10, 2017

    خرید کریو پر سرعت

    Greetings from Florida! I’m bored to demise at perform so I determined to verify out your site on my iphone during lunch split. I take pleasure in the info you offer right here and cannot wait to take a look when I get property. I’m surprised at how fa…

  11. December 10, 2017

    Title

    […]we like to honor lots of other internet web sites on the net, even if they aren’t linked to us, by linking to them. Underneath are some webpages worth checking out[…]

  12. December 11, 2017

    Judi Togel Online

    […]the time to read or check out the content or web pages we have linked to below the[…]

  13. December 11, 2017

    Judi Online Indonesia Terpercaya Terbaik

    […]that may be the end of this post. Right here you?ll locate some web sites that we consider you?ll enjoy, just click the hyperlinks over[…]

  14. December 11, 2017

    cheap dumpster rental prices

    […]check below, are some entirely unrelated web-sites to ours, even so, they’re most trustworthy sources that we use[…]

  15. December 11, 2017

    8-ch digital

    […]Sites of interest we’ve a link to[…]

  16. December 11, 2017

    tinnitus miracle cure

    […]always a major fan of linking to bloggers that I appreciate but really don’t get a great deal of link love from[…]

Leave a Reply